Abandonment Issues in Relationships
Do your fears of being abandoned keep you from somene into new relationships with others? Has love eluded you because the risk of experiencing emotional pain is too great a risk? If so, you may have major abandonment issues. At their core, fears of abandonment are a collection of feelings and thoughts that a person carries with them from earlier life experiences. In many cases, these fears can manifest into certain behaviors which can paradoxically prevent and destroy that abandonmet you want so much — love.
What follows are 5 ways you may be destroying your relationships because of abandonment issues. Read them all so that you can gain a better perspective on how your abandonment fears may be ruining your chances of receiving love. When you meet someone new who may have dating potential, do you immediately begin to create a list of their imperfections? Dxting you more focused about what is wrong with this person than what is right? Do you have a history of avoiding social situations that may offer the datingg to meet someone new in the romantic sense?
Do your fears of being hurt cause you to isolate? If so, look at your past for insight and see if there have been issues around emotional abandonment. When you do find yourself attracted to another, do you have a history of falling for the person hard and fast? Dating someone with fear of abandonment painful truth is that this particular attachment style has the unintentional effect of driving the person you want to be away.
Because you fear judgement and ultimately rejection, do you strive for perfection in all that dating someone with fear of abandonment do? Does this need to be perfect extend to your personal appearance with particular focus on your body image? Do you find it difficult to make a commitment to another in the romantic sense? Would some people describe you as a serial dater? Are you hooked on the newness of a relationship but the moment it gets stale, you bolt? People who have abandonment issues sabotage any real chance of love because they are afraid to commit.
Some describe this as a kind of commitment phobia. To a lesser or greater degree, all of us hold some fears of abandonment. In fact, having legitimate concerns about how we attach to others can be a healthy thing. This is turn can contribute to feelings of hopelessness and depression. If you are a person who has struggled with abandonment issues, I want to recommend a book by Dr. Claudia Black entitled, Changing Course: Healing from Loss, Abandonment and Fear. What I like about this book is og compassionate yet practical approach the author takes in helping to work through attachment issues while challenging us all to rethink long held notions about love and personal validation.
The most important thing to keep in mind is this — you are worthy of happiness. This psycho-spiritual principle is a universal construct that empowers all that we attract to us; including romance, wealth and emotional wellness. I hope dating someone with fear of abandonment found this post helpful. Thank you for reading Reaching Life Goals on Psychcentral! Please Like on FacebookPin on Pinterest and Share on Twitter! Or Get a Single, Daily Email: Psych Central does not provide medical, mental illness, or psychological advice, diagnosis or treatment.
Reaching Life Goals About the Blog Archives. Moore, PhD Described as folksy and down to earth, Dr. John Moore infuses current events, pop-culture and a bit of Hollywood into his posts as a way of communicating wider points on issues related to wellness and goal attainment. His work has been featured in nationally syndicated media, including Cosmo, Men's Fitness and CBS Market Watch. He is a consultant to a dating someone with fear of abandonment of Fortune companies and institutions of Higher Learning.
Moore is author of Confusing Love with Obsession and Editor in Chief at Guy Counseling. View all posts by John D. Related Content from Our Sponsors. APA Reference Oc, J. Retrieved on July 4,from https: Originally published on PsychCentral. How to Accept That Time Doesn't Heal All Wounds. Bullied by Narcissists at Work? Brain Training App May Counteract Mild Cognitive Impairment. Learn How to Break Your Addiction to Thinking.
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